Keep Holding On
by Just A Little Bit Dramatic
Summary: [Gift for Bad Alice] In that split second before my body was so horrifically attacked, I felt the pain coming…and that was sickening. I could do nothing…three days to go. Bella's POV of her tranformation...songfic...rated T to be safe...


**The song is basically something I thought fit incredibly well. It works as in, Bella's POV, but some of the song is what I imagine Edward to be thinking, some Bella's thoughts. But I love this song. And yes, it is an Avril Lavigne song, take that ****floccinaucinihilipilification! Never going to attempt to say that word.**

**I don't own Twilight or New Moon. And in saying that, sadly, I do not own Edward Cullen. It's vice versa. If I did own Twilight, New Moon and Edward Cullen, I'd know what happens in Eclipse. And I'd have a hot vampire boyfriend. I also don't own this song.**

_You're not alone,_

_Together we stand,_

_I'll be by your side,_

_You know I'll take your hand._

His lips, touching my neck so carefully, suddenly moved, allowing him to bite in, hard. I gasped, my hands gripping his shoulders roughly, allowing the precious poison to start coursing through me, knowing I had merely moments before my hell began.

"Edward…" I spoke his name quietly, but he stopped, a small trickle of blood running down his chin. His topaz eyes stared into mine, and his perfect face shadowed in doubt as he saw the paleness of my face. Not regret, it was fear…fear for the agony that was waiting eagerly.

A scream began to tear from my lips as the pain began, a pain that spread through my body like a wild bushfire. In that split second before my body was so horrifically attacked, I felt the pain coming…and that was sickening. I could do nothing…three days to go.

_When it gets cold,_

_And it feels like the end,_

_There's no place to go,_

_You know I won't give in,_

_No, I won't give in._

First everything went hot, and then cold. Though I could barely tell through the pain, I could feel my body changing. Knives pierced my skin at every possible area, almost as though the knives were trying to split the bone.

My throat felt raw from the intensity of my screaming. My head throbbed from the strain of screaming, of the pain, and the changes occurring over every inch of my skin. The first real change I felt was the blood.

Rolling over onto my side, I began to cough up blood. The angel was suddenly there, holding a bucket before me. He touched the area where I had been bitten, placing a towel over the sensitive area.

"Your body is expelling all blood, to replace it with venom. It's normal, Bella." His voice was soft, something I would have struggled to hear before. But now…it was loud, as though he was speaking in my ear, at normal volume. The second change. My hearing.

_Keep holding on,_

_Cause you know we'll make it through,_

_We'll make it through,_

_Just stay strong,_

_Cause you know I'm here for you,_

_I'm here for you._

The blood eventually stopped, and my body began to shake, trembling violently. I writhed in agony, the same way Edward had once done under Jane's glare. I bit into my lip to prevent the screams, but the skin split.

I could feel my teeth sharpening, not noticeably…but I felt it. Then I felt my cheekbones moving, setting themselves higher. Skin tightened over them, and I screamed, sobbing. Edward touched my hand, and I gripped his tightly, my eyes still shut.

Behind my eyelids, I saw flashes of red, orange, golden, and black. I couldn't open my eyes, see what was happening. But Edward murmured my name, and I forced them open. Made myself look at him. My heart lurched, and I realized I had mere hours before it stopped. Still. Dead.

_There's nothing you can say,_

_Nothing you can do,_

_There's no other way when it comes to the truth,_

_So keep holding on,_

_Cause you know we'll make it through,_

_We'll make it through._

My vision was different. Everything was enhanced, but still crimson in my agony. Edward was sitting by my side, his face so perfect…yet, saddened in his grief. He was grieving. For what? For me?

Breathing heavily, fighting for every breath, I moved my other hand on top of his. Still shaking, still stopping the screams, I forced a grim smile. Edward brushed the hair away from my flushed face, and I felt so cold…I started to shiver. He noticed.

"It's okay, Bella…when you lose that much blood, you'll get very cold. The venom will make your temperature neutral. That should start soon." He sounded remorseful. I moved to touch his face with my hand, but stopped when my back arched, and I screamed in sheer agony.

_So far away,_

_I wish you were here,_

_Before it's too late,_

_This could all disappear._

My grip on Edward's hand tightened as my entire back seemed to grow, and rapidly snap back into place. The moment it snapped, I was left with only the fiery pain. I was almost numb, used to the feeling, as one is with pins and needles. Except this was fire and daggers.

"How is she?" I vaguely heard a voice ask. I responded by screaming as agony drove up my chest, and a terrible pain splintered through my ribs, making it impossible for me to breathe. I sobbed, tears sliding down my face in hot waves, my head tilted towards the heavens.

"I shouldn't have done this…we could have fought the Volturi. Oh, God, I'm killing her…I'd go through a thousand days of my transformation to prevent her from suffering. Alice…I still remember the extent of the pain…how could I do this?" His voice was so full of anguish…angels shouldn't sound like that. Especially not this angel.

_Before the doors close,_

_And it comes to an end,_

_With you by my side,_

_I will fight and defend,_

_I'll fight and defend, yeah, yeah._

Rolling over, I began to jerk uncontrollably as I crawled over the edge of the mattress to the bucket, starting to retch. Edward's hands stroked my back, holding my hair away should the retching evolve into something worse.

Whimpering, I rolled back onto my back, feeling something soft and cold brush across my face. Wet, heavy…it finally dawned on me that it was a towel. Suddenly the varying temperatures didn't affect me; I couldn't feel anything.

"Edward…venom…" I managed to gasp, my nails digging into the satin sheets. He understood, and caught my hand once again. The pain returned, splitting my legs pieces. "Oh God…Edward…make it stop!"

_Keep holding on,_

_Cause you know we'll make it through,_

_We'll make it through,_

_Just stay strong,_

_Cause you know I'm here for you,_

_I'm here for you._

What seemed like an eternity later, the pain stopped. But there was something wrong. Something was holding me down…something heavy, firm, yet gentle at the same time. My eyes opened to find Edward lying over me.

"Bella, listen to me. The first day's over…in about a minute the pain will return. You _can't _move…your new strength will harm whatever human parts you have left." His voice was low and urgent.

Sobbing, I looked into his eyes. "Only a day…?" His lips met mine, and I began to calm. But the moment after he kissed me, he broke away. I frowned as he moved to my side once again, and braced myself for the return of my eternal torture.

_There's nothing you can say,_

_Nothing you can do,_

_There's no other way when it comes to the truth,_

_So keep holding on,_

_Cause you know we'll make it through,_

_We'll make it through._

This time I couldn't feel the physical changes…but the pain increased. It was as though hot knives were separating my joints, and no amount of holding back prevented the screams. Instead, I let them come.

Someone was trying to speak to me. "Bella, please, Bella…listen to me. It's Jasper. I'm going to try and take away some of the pain, okay? It might not work…but I'll try anyway." Another person claimed my other hand, but the pain only dulled a little.

"Thanks…Jasper…" I gasped. It was becoming harder and harder to take in air, and I started rolling around, squirming. My hand ripped from Jasper's and Edward's, and they didn't attempt to grab me for fear they'd only harm me. They couldn't hurt me any more than I already was aching…but they wouldn't risk it anyway.

_Hear me when I say,_

_When I say I believe,_

_Nothing's gonna change,_

_Nothing's gonna change trust in me._

I tried to move my arm, but it felt so much heavier…as though my blood had been replaced with lead. Panicked, I tried to move my other arm, pain still pulsing through me, my heart no longer pushing blood through me, but venom. Vampire venom.

I couldn't move my legs, or my torso. Instead I was forced to lay there, frozen in my agony, unable to even open my mouth to scream. My jaw was locked tight, and my eyes darted frantically from Edward to Jasper, still shielded in a crimson curtain.

"Your body isn't strong enough to move itself. You'll be immobile for another hour or so. While your muscles alter to fit your new abilities." Jasper whispered. Edward gripped my hand tighter, and Jasper looked at him. "I'll go get Alice and Emmett for her." He left the room.

_Whatever's meant to be,_

_Will work out perfectly,_

_Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah._

Alice sat beside me, mere centimetres from my touch, yet I was still unable to move. Her hands gently stroked the hair from my cheek. Emmett just sat on the end of the bed, watching me, as I lay there, a trapped statue.

Pain suddenly split through my head, and my eyes widened. My mouth wanted to scream, to release the agony through shrieking, but I was unable to. Edward saw my eyes widen drastically and, obviously remembering his own transformation, swore.

"Oh God, Bella…I didn't want you to feel this…" I barely heard his sobs, too lost in the pain throbbing throughout my skull. I'd choose death over this any day…but I was dying.

_Keep holding on,_

_Cause you know we'll make it through,_

_We'll make it through,_

_Just stay strong,_

_Cause you know I'm here for you,_

_I'm here for you._

A lifetime later, the pain stopped again. This time only for a moment, before returning as never before. And I was able to scream…my voice wavered, broke, and re-established itself in a matter of seconds, becoming more smooth…velvet…melodic.

The tears stopped, and I was unable to cry. Or maybe I'd used up my lifetime supply of tears to cry. Edward counted down the hours, humming my lullaby in my ears at the hardest of times, caressing my cheek, and holding my hand in his.

In the last hour…the pain became unimaginably unbearable. And the biggest change occurred…one I should have expected, but I had forgotten.

_There's nothing you can say,_

_Nothing you can do,_

_There's no other way when it comes to the truth,_

_So keep holding on,_

_Cause you know we'll make it through,_

_We'll make it through._

A piercing fire ran through my body, through my veins, tracking down my heart. For a few terrifying moments, my heart fought the fire…and then started to slow. Thump…thump…thump…then nothing.

I gasped in air for a few moments, trying to adjust to breathing without a heartbeat, and suddenly the pain vanished, and I relaxed, limp on the bed. Breathing heavily, Edward looked at me, nervous anticipation in his eyes.

"It was worth it." My lips were suddenly against his, at a speed that shocked me. I was a vampire…I'd be with him for eternity. The hardest part was over. We'd made it.

_There's nothing you could say,_

_Nothing you could do,_

_There's no other way when it comes to the truth,_

_So keep holding on,_

_Cause you know we'll make it through,_

_We'll make it through._

**Well? What do you think? My oneshots/songfics generally get good reactions, so I hope this is no exception. If you like it, though, check out my profile. If you haven't read them, I have heaps of Twilight oneshots/songfics, and they have all gotten a few reviews.**

**Please review, if not for me, for Edward Cullen (or whichever Cullen you like. Personally I'm in love with Edward, but I have a friend who really likes Emmett, a reviewer who really likes Jasper, and another friend who said if they were older, they'd like Carlisle.)! **

**Just A Little Bit Dramatic**


End file.
